Meeting Kate!

Nanny and Kate
Kate, curious Muggsy, and me

As if she were my own child, I fell in love with little Kate when I first held her this weekend. She is the most beautiful child (I know everyone says that about babies close to them, but she really is!!) and has the most gorgeous head of red hair. She is very blessed to have wonderful parents, her Nanny, Oma and Opa (Hans and Kathy, Sarah's parents), and the rest of her family. Kate will be one spoiled child. I am only sad that we don't live closer to her. Now, each time we see her, she will have changed, if only just a little bit. I regret that I can't be a better auntie.

There is just too much snow here!

From today's Boston Globe


I am posting from my kitchen since (snap!) I have a laptop battery. I haven't had a battery for my mac in over a year and I just never really cared to have one because I kept it plugged in the whole time. Nor did I mind that every time the computer came unplugged, the date would read Dec. 31, 1969. Yes, this happens with apple computers. However, when I dropped the computer (only about two feet) and the power cord was messed up to the point where the computer would become unplugged every five minutes, I started to mind. And that is when Brian bought me a new battery.

Well, we are on day three of the big snowstorm of 2008. I spoke too soon in yesterday's post and now I am getting cabin fever. What was I thinking when I moved here? I have only left the house (besides walking around outside) once since Friday at 11 am. It's quite sad. However, we can walk several places from the apartment so we are fortunate in that sense. Also, we have power and that is definitely something to be thankful for.

Last night, my friend and co-aide at school, Jessie, picked me up in a 4-wheel drive SUV so that we could go to a holiday party at another teacher's home in Framingham, about ten minutes from here. The roads weren't so bad then, and the party was pretty fun. I made an interesting trifle that I will make again, only I will replace the brownies with a softer cake. We had a Yankee Swap and I ended up with three Christmas themed nesting bowls. Jessie brought those and she ended up with my gift, a cranberry scented candle from Anthropologie. I almost got the bottle of yellow tail, which could be quite useful right now.

And what have I done today? I have watched a lot of TV, which is another thing that makes me feel guilty about myself, but unfortunately, it happens in the winter. Brian is trying out this new program called Hulu, and we have been watching old and new TV shows, like The Office (Season five), WKRP (and Cincinnati looks the same as it did thirty years ago), and we watched an episode of Hell's Kitchen tonight, which is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen. Also, I did yoga as I watched yoga videos on the internet (my exercise for the day) and now I am making a healthy (?) beef and eggplant lasagna.

As I am ending my post, it has stopped snowing.

Frosted windowpanes, candles gleaming inside, painted candy canes on the tree, just look and you'll see

What a beautiful morning to wake up to today! We have about 10-12 inches of snow on the ground, we don't have anywhere to be (except a work Christmas party tonight), and the apartment is quite warm. What more can one ask for? Well, I am awake early, per usual, and am just sitting around typing away and watching All I Want for Christmas, a sappy 1990's Christmas film, on TV.

Due to a power outage from the crazy ice storm we had on Dec. 11th and bad weather forecasted for yesterday, we only had three and a half days of school last week. This week, we only have one and a half days of school; personally, I don't even think we should go because it leaves so little time to go home for Christmas. Brian and I (and possibly Geralyn?) are leaving on Tuesday at 4 pm and we have to make it to Louisville for the Christmas Eve family party at 5:30. I guess we'll be driving all night and I am praying that the weather is decent for the long trip, but so far, it looks good for Tuesday.

Gift giving. I've spent too much on presents this year again. However, I feel like I haven't done much giving to charities or volunteering this year and that makes me feel quite guilty. Also, at the end of the year, there is this time of reflection. What have I done this year that I am proud of? Let's see, there are probably only three significant things-- 1) I was married to Brian, 2) I changed my career to something that I enjoy, even though I took a pay cut, and 3) I became an aunt (and that really wasn't something I personally did). Other than that, I am not so sure. We can only try to improve ourselves for the next year.

#100

"Most of life is so dull that there is nothing to be said about it, and the books and talk that would describe it as interesting are obliged to exaggerate, in the hope of justifying their own existence. Inside its cocoon of work or social obligation, the human spirit slumbers for the most part, registering the distinction between pleasure and pain, but not nearly as alert as we pretend. There are periods in the most thrilling day during which nothing happens, and though we continue to exclaim, 'I do enjoy myself,' or, 'I am horrified,' we are insincere. 'As far as I feel anything, it is enjoyment, horror'-- it's no more than that really, and a perfectly adjusted organism would be silent."

Excerpt from A Passage to India by E.M. Forster

I've been pondering the fact that one of the eight stations they play at the gym is the Home Shopping Network...

It's not like I am going to grab my cell phone from my locker in the middle of working out on the elliptical machine or the treadmill and order that fabulous CZ ring or the the skincare line that is being promoted by Susan Lucci.

It goes like this, the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall, the major lift, the baffled king composed Hallelujah...

Although this week was not really a stressful week at school, I was nevertheless happy to be home on Friday afternoon, to relax and reflect. My job can be very challenging and stressful, but it is almost never boring, unlike the job at the credit union, and for that I am appreciative and satisfied. Yet, I also worry about these kids, not only in school, but what will become of them in the future. I think for some of them, the real world will be very harsh; I wish it were not so, but reality can really be a disillusionment at times.

After hearing about my friend Dena's upcoming engagement party in Oxford, Mississippi, in February, I decided (a little bit impulsively) that I wanted to go. The last time I was there was in the spring of 2006 to see my old roommate, Allison's, senior recital. I have to admit that I am often haunted by the deep south and feel myself drawn there. So, I purchased a plane ticket on Friday afternoon from Providence to Memphis, and now I am delighted that I made this decision. I see my friends traveling to all these different cities and countries and I must admit, yes, I am jealous. One person I know from high school aspires to travel to fifty different countries before she reaches age 28, and she said she is almost there. Although I don't think of her travel is work-related and I don't have a clue how she affords it, but that is really not my business.

On Friday, all I did was relax and watch reruns of "The Office." Funny show. Saturday, I prepared a special birthday dinner for my mother-in-law-- a spinach salad, cajun shrimp casserole, and a peppermint chocolate cake that she loves (and is so rich that I only make it once a year). We had a nice evening having dinner and playing a downloaded demo version of "Are you smarter than a fifth grader?" (I wasn't, at least not every round). On Sunday, I sang at church, had lunch with Mary in Burlington, we shopped at L.L. Bean and Ann Taylor Loft, and had the most wonderful pedicures at the Green Tangerine salon.

It was nice coming home to my husband on Sunday evening. All we did was lay around, watched more episodes of "The Office" and snuggled in the cold, New England winter.

Pie for everyone

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday; it even tops Christmas and Halloween (and even my birthday) for the year. There are no presents and if you're not hosting the big feast, there is not much work involved. However, I always have to make a dish or two (or four this year) for the dinner because I love to cook! Yesterday, after getting off of work at 10:30 am (woo hoo), I came home, watched Beverly Hills 90210, and made my homemade pie crusts, which actually turned out well, except that they are a little fragile on the edges. Actually, I am really looking forward to hosting my own Thanksgiving dinner someday, especially when we have a lovely house to host it in and more than four chairs.

On such a happy day, I feel so bad for all the people who died or have been injured in India. At the gym today though, I had a hard time watching CNN with the coverage of the attacks. It is just hard for me to grasp it all. In the Crowded House song, "Don't Dream it's Over," there's a line that says "in the paper today, tales of war and of waste, but you turn right over to the TV page." I often feel like I am the most superficial person for doing this, but I also know this is kind of the norm for our generation. A teenager is more familiar with Paris Hilton and the Jonas Brothers than Dick Cheney or Angela Merkel (the Chancellor of Germany). It is extremely sad.

Anyway, we are going to Gretchen and Andy's house for dinner at three, where we will eat, gab, and play "Scene It: The DVD game." I'll miss my family in Kentucky, but it won't be too long before we are home with them.

Welcome to the world, Baby Kate!

I became an aunt last Friday to a beautiful, red-headed, 6 lb.13 oz. baby named Katherine Ella, or affectionately, Kate! Her parents are so happy and so is our family. With the passing of Walt last year, it is nice that we have another person in our family; Walt would have been a wonderful grandfather to little Kate. I am so excited to see her in a few weeks. As an aunt who will spoil that little girl, I already bought her a pink red sox hat (so she knows early on who her allegiance is with) and some hair bows for her luscious hair.

There is another baby to look forward to in June, as Eliot and Sarah are pregnant as well. When will Brian and I try to get pregnant? Well, you never know.


Kate with her proud parents, Graham and Sarah

Intimations of Immortality...

I should be elated and joyful on a Friday, but somehow, I am just feeling sad. The sky is overcast and it is humid outside. I left school at two and headed home. Brian came home as I was practicing a choral piece, Intimations of Immortality, and then I walked to the bank and the library down the street. I adore going to the library (as a nerd like me so often does) but mostly go to check out magazines (like Martha Stewart Living, etc.) and DVD's. Anyway, on the way home, I just had this wave of sadness run over me because I still feel alone here. Unlike before, I actually like my job and my co-workers, but I still just feel disconnected from everything. Maybe it is because my interests are odd-- music, reading, history, etc. I'm quite comfortable in my own skin though, and it seems much easier to survive than it was so many years ago.

Brian and I are going to an early sushi dinner and then I am going to the rehearsal for Assabet Valley Mastersingers. We have a concert tomorrow night featuring the aforementioned piece composed by Gerald Finzi from the text of William Wordsworth's poetry (they are the most poignant, beautiful lyrics I've ever heard) and Dona Nobis Pacem by Ralph Vaughn Williams. I feel like I failed a little in the rehearsal on Wednesday night because our section was not in time with the orchestra and conductor. However, I think everyone felt this way. Hopefully, tonight's rehearsal will be better and the concert better still.

On Sunday, I'm singing in choir at the Lutheran church and then I am going to the city with Mary and Natyra for the free King Arthur Flour Baking Company class on making festive pies and cookies. What a great excuse to go to Boston!

—But there's a tree, of many, one,
A single field which I have look'd upon,
Both of them speak of something that is gone:
The pansy at my feet
Doth the same tale repeat:
Whither is fled the visionary gleam?
Where is it now, the glory and the dream?

Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting:
The Soul that rises with us, our life's Star,
Hath had elsewhere its setting,
And cometh from afar:
Not in entire forgetfulness,
And not in utter nakedness,
But trailing clouds of glory do we come
From God, who is our home:
Heaven lies about us in our infancy!
Shades of the prison-house begin to close
Upon the growing Boy,
But he beholds the light, and whence it flows,
He sees it in his joy;
The Youth, who daily farther from the east
Must travel, still is Nature's priest,
And by the vision splendid
Is on his way attended;
At length the Man perceives it die away,
And fade into the light of common day.

Last Stop Wonderland

We had a very fun Sunday. I had an off week from choir, so Brian and I went to Brookline (a small city right next to Boston, where JFK was born) to meet a couple we know, Mike and Jessica and their baby Zoe,as well as to hear Jessica sing with a choir at an Episcopal church service. We were a little late to the service because someone (eh-hem, not me) did not renew their inspection sticker and we were pulled over by the police. He got off with a warning for the inspection sticker, but was charged $25 for not wearing a seatbelt. I think he totally deserved the fine and probably got off too easily on the sticker. I was also angry that Brian is still not wearing his seatbelt, and reminded him that I could have been seriously hurt in my accident if I had not been wearing my safety belt. There were so many reasons why Ralph Nader lobbied for seat belts!

After church, we went to this divine Indian restaurant down the street from the church called the Rani Bistro, where we all had the Sunday buffet, excluding one-year-old Zoe. Like I am with Mexican, Cuban, and Japanese food, the same goes for Indian cuisine; I could probably indulge in it everyday and not be tired of it.

We drove to the New England Aquarium afterwards, determined it was too expensive to park, and then drove to East Boston to park at Mike and Jessica's apartment for free and took the blue line T to the aquarium. I brought eight dollar passes from the library (yay for reduced museum admissions) for all and Brian was able to get in for free with his teacher's union membership. The aquarium was very cool. We started out in the huge penguin lair and proceeded up the winding staircase past the absolutely huge saltwater tank with sharks, rays, fish, turtles, etc. to more exhibits. Although I tend to feel that most aquariums are alike, this one was rather nice, but I still think the Shedd Aquarium in Chicago is better. However, there was a chilling, yet soothing jelly fish exhibit and I must say that all jelly fish in their medusa stage are absolutely fascinating and beautiful. Zoe enjoyed viewing the exhibits and animals, too, and that was really important to us.

We're back at home now. The night has been quiet; Brian watched another conspiracy film and I made vanilla cupcakes (Amy Sedaris'recipe) with strawberry buttercream frosting for National Vanilla Cupcake day tomorrow. And they happen to be delicious, which is always good for Brian, who loves to eat them.

Crrrrrassssssh...

Unfortunately, Tuesday was not the best day for me. However, it was certainly worse for the fate of my car, the little Ford Focus that could. As I was headed to choir at St. John's Evangelical Lutheran Church on Route 117 in Sudbury, another driver decided to completely and blatantly ignore a stop sign in a very important place in an intersection. I had no stop sign and when I observed the driver refusing to stop, well, it was just way too late. There was an impact and I saw what I thought was smoke (it was actually the powder from the airbags), so I unbuckled my belt and leaped out of the car. A man who lived in the house at the intersection came out and told me he had called 911. I started screaming and saying that the other driver just didn't stop. And the whole time, the other driver just walked around in a daze, holding his beer belly and not saying anything to me. I honestly thought he was intoxicated, but he was not. Even so, what a jerk!! The police came like two minutes after the crash, as well as ambulances from the fire department. After a few people questioned me about my information and the circumstances of the crash, I was taken to the hospital to make sure I hadn't endured any injuries. I called my mother first, who was a little frantic, but helpful, and then I called Brian and his phone was not on! It was a bit of a nightmare, but my mom called Brian's parents and they ended up going over to our apartment to tell him. Anyway, at the hospital, they simply questioned me about the accident details and took X-rays of my chest. Brian took me home at about 10:30, three hours after the accident.

I took Wednesday off of work because I wanted to rest and I knew there would be tons of phone calls to make to my insurance company, etc. After several calls and one visit to the Sudbury police department, I finally found out the name of the other driver and his insurance information. Although the insurance companies have not yet determined whose fault it was (and this still baffles me), he was issued a citation for not stopping at a stop sign, and therefore, will be at fault. The insurance company determined that my Ford was a total loss because of the excessive damage to the hood and engine and will give me $5700 with sales tax. I don't think this is too bad, considering I had the car for three and a half years and probably paid $9400 for the car, including the interest on the loan. The only bad thing is that I just paid off the loan in August and literally received the title last week, because it had to be transferred from state-to-state.

Of course, I had to rent a car on Wednesday so that I could get to work each day. His insurance will be reimbursing me. Although I have a feeling that it might take a while. Currently, I am driving a Dodge Caliber, which I would never buy. It has the worst visibility ever.

Everyone at school was pretty concerned about me when I told them what happened. I had also called another aide on Tuesday to let her know about the accident. On Thursday, I ended up going back to the doctor to have them look at my wrist, which is quite sore and is hurts when I bend it or flex it certain ways. The doctor said it was fine and that it should heal soon. She did look at my bruises on my hips (from the seatbelt) and recommended that I take pictures of them for any legal matters. I hope this doesn't come to that situation.

The best thing to happen as a result of the accident is that I now have to buy a new car, which is something I've wanted to do for a while. Since I did pay off the car recently, I was looking forward to not having a car loan for a few years. After Brian researched several cars on a consumer reports website and edmunds.com, we narrowed our search down to three cars-- the Honda Fit, the Toyota Yaris, and the Mazda 3. Last night, we drove to the three dealerships on Route 9 in Westborough (isn't it funny how these dealerships are so close to each other). We test drove all three cars (and the Mazda 3 had a manual transmission, which I really want!) and they were all good cars, but we determined that the Yaris was not for us. Also, the odometer was in the middle of the car and the car itself had a very plastic-y feel. The Mazda was great and had a good price, but this morning we have decided to go with the basic Honda Fit with a manual transmission. The only problem is that the car is in very high demand and we will have to call around to different dealerships and may possibly have to wait a few weeks to acquire one. As for the rental car, this DB(use your imagination)'s insurance company will just have to pay for the car a little longer. He had a thirteen-year-old Toyota. Obviously, he wanted a quality car, too.

That was probably a long and tedious explanation of the events that occurred. I hope no one has to endure an event like this, but I wasn't hurt (and the other driver wasn't either) and that is the most important thing.

Oh that boy of mine, by my side, the silver moon and the evening tide...

How do I love Saturdays? Let me count the ways. Now that I no longer work at a credit union or bank, I don't have to work on Saturdays any more and I love it!! Saturday will now be my new day to sleep in (until nine today; I'm not a very late sleeper), since I will now be going to church most Sundays for choir.

Today looks like a lazy day. I'll probably go to the mall and the grocery and cook a little bit. Tonight, Brian and I have been invited to a housewarming party given by someone in chorus who I've been talking to lately. I feel like I don't really know her very well, but this is a nice gesture and she is a very nice and gregarious person (this is something I highly admire).




I've been thinking a lot about my stepfather lately. Although it's been almost a year since he's been gone, I still miss him all the time. My parents came to visit Brian and me in 2006 and we visited Salem for the first time, and when I went there with Mary and Natyra two weeks ago, it really reminded me of Walt. I don't really buy or have a lot of trinkets around our house, but I have a few things that Walt gave me that are very sentimental to my heart. One of these items is a little green stone that he bought in Salem. I don't know anything about it; all I know is that I keep this stone in my wallet so that a part of Walt is constantly with me. Walt had two daughters, both of whom my mom has tried to keep in contact with, but recently, one of them has been very cruel to my mother, especially because she is now engaged to another man. I cannot say I am surprised by this behavior because of the way my former stepsister has behaved in the past, but I am completely disappointed and I believe that Walt would be very upset with her as well. The animosity has gotten so bad that my mother has now blocked her e-mail address and has ceased contact with her. I only hope that this situation gets better for everyone involved.

One of my goals is to let Walt's spirit live through me. He was a magnanimous person who was not judgmental, he tried to maintain a positive attitude all the time, and he was all about being an individual. When I lost him, I felt that I really lost the best part of myself. When I lived in Louisville or even when I traveled there from Mass., I always felt so comfortable and so accepted when I visited Mom and Walt in their country home in Bloomfield. Their home was isolated from the metropolitan area of Louisville, and it was so relaxing being there with my parents. My parents were my good friends and understood me best of all. Now that Walt is gone, my peaceful sanctuary is gone. However, I believe that if I carry him with me forever, everything will be alright.

In the New York Minute...

View from UN Millennium Plaza!

This past weekend was one of the best I have had in a long while. As aforementioned, the fall is amazing up here in New England and not too shabby in New York City either. On Friday afternoon, I drove to Stamford, Connecticut, to catch the train, and ended up being in more traffic than I had hoped for, but that was fine. I arrived at Grand Central Station at 6:45 and walked to the UN Millennium Plaza on 44th Street between 1st and 2nd Avenue. Our room was on the 37th floor and the view was totally amazing!! Also, the decor for the room was very fresh and modern. It was certainly the best $300 I have spent on a hotel room in New York and it was even better than the Plaza near Central Park. I met Paul near Penn Station at eight and we walked around for a while looking for places to eat. We ended up at this little neighborhood joint called Duke's (mediocre) and then went back to the hotel. With both of us working in schools, we were quite tired and fell asleep instead of going out on the town (sorry Paul!).

On Saturday, we had coffee/chai tea in Bryant Park, bought tickets to see Spring Awakening, and had brunch in Hell's Kitchen. The show started at 2 pm and well, it was quite different from any musical I had ever seen. First of all, audience members were actually sitting on the stage, and secondly, it was based on a very scandalous play written in the 1890's, which I thought was simply astonishing. The music was composed by Duncan Sheik, who had a hit with "Barely Breathing" in the 1990's. Also, the show won a Tony Award for Best Musical in 2007. I'm not the most eloquent in describing the shows I've seen, but I will say that this was a musical I will never forget. I don't think Paul will, either.

We ended our short trip to NYC after we dined at a nice Mexican restaurant and headed off in different directions towards home. We will continue to keep our October tradition with a trip to New York next year!

I don't know why I go to extremes...

This is the cake I made for the party!


I'm very excited about this weekend. On Tuesday, I was not entirely excited about it because a now ex-friend let me down (I now know why we drifted apart nearly eight years ago after high school and I should never have rekindled this friendship) and the weather looked rainy in New York, but now, I am just happy to be going with my dear friend Paul, plus the weather looks sunny and about seventy degrees.

Last night, I went to another aide's house for dinner and drinks, along with the other aides and teachers in the special education program. We all had a really good time and I had one tequila shot too many (which was only one shot!). The teachers gave the aides these cute mock-awards and I received the "Sweetest" award. According to them and my blog's title, I apparently really am a proper southern belle. That is, until I've had a few drinks in me. It is so refreshing to work with people who are nice and who do not get too clique-y with each other and exclude you from everything. Honestly, I just put up with that for too long of a time.

I made a lovely no-bake cheesecake from the October Martha Stewart Living magazine for the party and I felt that it was a huge success. Also, I made a delicious butternut squash lasagna using one of Gretchen's squashes from the garden. Cooking and baking makes me feel very accomplished.

Today I have a holiday because of Yom Kippur. We also have Columbus Day off on Monday. However, today I don't have a complete day off because I have to babysit from 11 until 7. Also, I am letting my employer know that I will be quitting soon. My new choir starts next week and I will be quite busy.

In addition to the New York trip tomorrow, Brian and I are going hiking in Western Mass. on Sunday and hopefully just relaxing on Monday. I hope to read a lot of my book, The Witches of Eastwick, this weekend as well.

My days have been full of Rodeo Drive and pumpkin seeds?

I have two new obsessions; unfortunately, they both have to do with television. The less important one is my new-found love of watching reruns of the old "Beverly Hills 90210" on Soapnet. I didn't even know we had Soapnet until last week. At my babysitting job, I haven't been doing much after the kids get their homework done, so I take advantage of the family's satellite TV and now I am immersed in the world of Dylan's bed hopping, Steve's mullet, Brenda's bad French accent, and Andrea's zealous love of journalism and Brandon Walsh. Not to mention David's synthesizer "skillz," Donna's virginity woes, Kelly's perfection (almost), and the omniscient advice of Cindy and Jim Walsh. Great show. I haven't watched the reincarnation, but I don't believe it would live up the award-winning caliber of the original show.

Anyway, my other obsession is with Gillian McKeith and her show on BBC America called "You Are What you Eat".
She practices holistic health and believes in eating a lot of fruits, veg (vegetables), seeds and nuts, and oily fish. Basically, everything that is natural and good for you and what you should be eating. The format in the half hour show is that she will have a food junkie who is eating a terrible diet and will reform them for eight weeks with a kind of detox plan as well as exercise. It is quite wonderful and if I had the time, my hope is to have this kind of natural and diverse food on the table every night. I also feel like my diet is not very colorful; I should be eating more green, red, purple foods, etc. However, today I went to the grocery store and bought several good foods-- tomatoes, red pears, bananas, acorn squash, raw pumpkin seeds, and carrots. Anyway, Mrs. McKeith has a couple of books that I really want to buy for healthier eating habits.

Speaking of babysitting, I am going to be giving my notice to quit next week. The hours have been too long during the week and I haven't been able to spend very much time with my husband. I miss cooking for Brian (see above paragraph on healthier foods), going to the gym, and just having free time during the week. Plus, I am going to start singing at a Lutheran church for a small compensation. Very excited about this. I think that my employer will be upset but it is my decision.

Tomorrow, I'm going to a little place called Salem with friends. It can be very touristy in the fall, but it has a very cool ambiance this time of year. We may go to a house museum and a graveyard. I'll always enjoy day trips with friends.

All the loneliness in this world, you know it's just not fair...

Did you know that you are more likely to be depressed in the morning than at other times of day? I know this in part because I used to cry almost every morning in the shower during my last semester of college (it was a very difficult time for me).

Saying this, I wake up to find that I'm not invited to an important event and even though I live 950 miles away, it is still a bit upsetting. Actually, I'm kind of hurt, but the older I get, the less I can find any sort of full-out trust in people.

The babysitting job is getting out of hand. The mom asked me to go in the garage and check for what was making a terrible smell and it just happened to be two dead rats or mice that were maggot-infested. Yay.

Another day, another dollar. And Brian is sleeping in because he has the day off of school.

Friday, I'm in love...

First, a quote: "Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow them."- Louisa May Alcott

Although I do enjoy my job and part of the reason that I like it is because it is challenging, I am still happy when a long week ends. I think there are some aspects of my position that I am good at, like helping kids to understand and relate to situations and I feel like I have more patience than I ever thought I would with them. However, I often get frustrated when I cannot understand some of our more severely disabled kids or when I feel like I am being relegated to one child who no one else wants to deal with. The latter of these I might be exaggerating because I think it varies from day to day. Actually, I think that if I do work with some of these more challenging children more often, I can learn more and become a better teacher.

It's raining today and I am about to make a lasagna for a member of my choir who has just had knee surgery. I'm bringing over my spinach lasagna, salad, and a few rolls. Dotty has always been nice to me and I feel it is a very nice thing to make dinner for her. Besides, I love to cook.

We're going to one of two children's birthday party tomorrow. Either one for one-year-old Jackson or one-year-old Zoe. Whomever it is, I am going to Janie and Jack tomorrow to look for a gift for them. That store is so cute! While I am at the Natick Mall, I am also going to Nordstrom to try on a pair of Dansko shoes so that my brother can get them for me at a discount from a shoe store in Louisville. They're expensive, but definitely worth it. Also, I have a gap gift certificate to spend on khaki-colored corduroy pants for the fall.

Brian was very sweet and asked if I wanted to go eat at the Wildwood Steakhouse for dinner. He is really thoughtful.

Red Sox game tonight!

OMG, I have the biggest headache ever right now. I just had to pop some pills to eliminate it and I hope it goes away by five. We're driving (eeeek!) into the city tonight for one of the last Red Sox games of the season against the Cleveland Indians. It's supposed to be colder this evening, but the games are usually a blast. Now, getting into and out of the city can be quite annoying. When we went to the Sox/Orioles game in June, it took almost three hours to get into the city with a combination of traffic and the train. Normally, it takes about an hour and a half. Anyway, since the Red Sox are still battling the Rays for the division title, every game is crucial and this one should be exciting.

The weekend was a busy one, but I always enjoy those. I've never been one to relax a lot. On Friday, I had dinner at an Indian restaurant in Lexington with Mary and Natyra and we discussed fall day trips for the season. Salem, Concord, Plymouth, etc. Fall is always a delightful time here in this part of the world.

Brian's friend Mike came to visit us on Saturday with his daughter, Zoe, who is one. They discussed conspiracy movies, played a little music, and we grabbed a bite to eat at the cafe down the street. That night, we met some of the Ashland teachers at Red Robin in Millbury for dinner. The food was great, but the service was atrocious; I had to ask for bbq sauce three times. We planned on seeing Burn After Reading, but unfortunately, the movie was sold out. Instead, we had drinks at the movie theatre bar (yes, that is correct) and Brian and I watched Baby Mama at home. Amy and Tina are quite a team and both adorable, but the movie was less than stellar. Just my opinion, though.

I helped out the organist from my wedding at her church yesterday by singing with their choir. It was interesting being a "ringer." We sang an original piece written by another choir member, as well as Herbert Howells' Magnificat. She has now asked me if I want to sing with her choir and I could be compensated for it, which is kind of a dream for me, even though there is just a little money involved. However, I have very little free time during the week and this would now eliminate any free time on Tuesday evening. So, I'm contemplating the decision. I feel honored though and it would be a good opportunity.

Headache is still here and the we're leaving in an hour.

We've been dancin' with Mr. Brownstone, he's been knockin', he won't leave me alone...

I played Rockband with the kids last night and realized yet again how much I love it, regardless of the fact that I don't even know half of the songs on there. Very sad for me actually.

I'm now getting ready to go to a belated birthday dinner (my own) in Lexington with Mary and Natyra. Hopefully, we will order some palik paneer, naan, and a wonderful spicy shrimp dish. Oh, you know, the usual.

By the way, I have a new haircut and I love it. My hair is so much easier to take care of and blow dry. This is great for 6 am mornings.

However much I love the fall right now, I still dread the New England winters....

While that Lucky Old Sun has nothin' to do but roll around Heaven all day...

This week has been a great one. I have started my two jobs-- the special education aide at the high school as well as the babysitting job for Robin, my former dental hygienist. It has been a busy and different experience and a challenge as well. I have to admit that I enjoy having a job where I am never bored and am not staring at the computer all day, looking up random facts on wikipedia or what-have-you. My jobs have more of a purpose now and that is something to feel accomplished about.

The first two days of the week consisted of staff meetings and becoming acquainted with a lot of new faces. Everyone seems really nice so far, which is actually a better feeling than I got when I started working at the credit union. There was just a strange vibe there all the time. On Wednesday, the kids came for the first day and I was placed temporarily in the life skills classroom, where the kids need the most help. They are all really great kids, though, and it is really satisfying to help them and just makes me feel magnanimous and benevolent inside. In a few weeks, I will move to a different classroom setting and possibly work with kids who need help with specific language arts subjects; the administration is not quite sure yet.

My babysitting job has simply consisted of going over to Robin's house in Westborough, helping her two kids with their homework, taking them places, and cooking dinner if they want it before their parents arrive home. We are going to make a pizza together on my new pizza stone tomorrow night and that is always exciting!

It was wonderful arriving home from work at 2:10 on Friday afternoon. Anyone who has worked at a bank/credit union knows about the long hours on Fridays, as well as Saturday mornings. In addition, we were open until 6 on Thursday, which made it feel like one was always there. Anyway, I had a leisurely Friday doing laundry, reading, watching TV, etc. Saturday was my 26th birthday and I went to the gym in the morning and got a pedicure in the afternoon. Then Brian and I met some people from his school district in Franklin to drive to Providence for Waterfire, a summer event where there are 101 bonfires lit on the river. Another girl, Jess, had a birthday on Friday and we had dinner at the Cheesecake Factory for dinner. Almost everyone had cheesecake for dessert and Brian and I tried a different one, chocolate coconut cream cheesecake, which was delicious and tasted like a Mounds candy bar. I will have to go there in the fall for some pumpkin cheesecake (my favorite)! We walked around until midnight looking at the bonfires and listening to beautiful music. It was a very strange, yet romantic ambiance.

Yesterday, we went to Tanglewood in the Berkshires for a Terrence Blanchard concert. Tanglewood is a beautiful outdoor music venue in Western Massachusetts with several concert spaces. We saw the concert in the Ozawa hall, but you can also sit on the lawn, bring a picnic dinner, and gaze at the night sky while listening to this beautiful music. This evening was especially moving because it was Terrence's composition,

A Tale of God's Will: Requiem for Katrina

, written for Spike Lee's documentary, When the Levees Broke. This is the third anniversary of Hurricane Katrina and another hurricane, Gustav, is approaching New Orleans and the performance was emotional for everyone. Ashe, which means Amen is my favorite piece. It really makes you think about the sadness of losing your home once and possibly losing it again.