A nice trip home...

Well, I never did report on my trip to Kentucky, but I will give a summary. I flew on Northwest airlines, which could be a mistake, but I guess it could have been worse, so I won’t complain. The airline is just having some problems this summer. Anyway, I arrived home on Wednesday, Aug. 15th at 10:30, about two hours late. On Thursday, I had brunch with my sorority sister and friend (because I can’t say that about all of my s.sisters, especially one who married my ex), Dena at Mimi’s Café, a wonderful place for breakfast, went to see Katherine at Value Market, saw Butterscotch (the kitten) at mom’s office, and received a lovely pedi and mani in a shade of fuchsia. That evening, my family and I went to Havana Rumba (my favorite restaurant ever!) and I went over to my high school friend Deirdre’s new condo in Prospect. Friday, mom and I got an early start and went to several bridal shops, where I was very embarrassed because like everyone saw my breasts (I hate bridal dressing rooms sometimes), and none of the dresses fit. Now, I know that people are skeptical about David’s bridal, and I can be a bit pretentious myself, but at least they had dresses that fit me. I see the practicality of having dresses in only one size (normally, a 10), but when they are smaller and one cannot fit into the dress, then how can one decide whether or not this is her “dream dress?” So, I was able to try one on at David’s Bridal in my size (?) and it was nice. Yes, I am wearing a tea length dress because I want to and I can show off some fabulous shoes wearing the dress. I am very picky and this wedding is going to be different, and that makes me very happy. Also, I don’t want to wear a veil, period. My mom was nice enough to buy the dress; I wasn’t expecting her to do that and so, it was a sweet surprise. That night, I went over to my friend Stephanie’s house to meet her new daughter, Ella, and go to dinner. We ate at Chili’s, which I love, but some people question. Why, I’m not sure. Anyway, then I met with Celeste and her new boyfriend on 4th Street Live.

Unfortunately, I was ill for the rest of the weekend but I just kept going. My throat was sore for two days and I had a cold, which I gave to Brian later on last week. Saturday, I had to go to a family get –together in Lexington, which was fun, but I was tired and had to talk a lot. That night, Graham had a party for Sarah because she just graduated with her Ph.D. in clinical psychology. They had barbeque and everyone sat outside. Also, Sarah got a puppy from her dad for her birthday. It’s a Puli (a Hungarian sheepdog), and it is so cute. His name is Muggsy and he is black and furry. He’s a very hyper dog who likes to play. There were some neighborhood kids at the party who really liked playing with Muggsy. Sunday, I met Katherine and Eric for breakfast at the Cracker Barrel and then I went to their house to see their new cat, Jack, whom they adopted from my mom. Jack is Butterscotch’s brother, and I met their mom also, Spotty. They are all adorable. I then returned to Grandad’s to pack and say goodbye and then met my friend Nora for coffee. I was introduced to Nora through Matt Lawson, who played trumpet with Brian at the University of Louisville. Nora and Matt used to date, but they broke up a while ago. I believe I’ve talked about her in the past. She sent me this package of all this nice stuff a few months ago, and she is very smart and well-read. I enjoy being around her because we have a lot to talk about. Lastly, mom, Walt, Graham, Sarah, and I went to look at the Louisville Slugger museum as a reception site for Brian and me. However, I don’t really think it’s for me. I think that we will probably have the reception at a country club. So, that was the trip. I hope I didn’t say that that the summary would be short!!

It’s been hot in our apartment and next summer, I am begging to get air conditioning. Oh, Brian got a job last week in Ashland, Mass., which is about twenty minutes away from Marlborough. We are both really happy and relieved because he will be making a good salary. And after next month, he is paying all the rent, which means I can start to really pay down those student loans and my goal is to pay off my car before the wedding next year. I can’t wait! Also, we can really start to plan the wedding now.

We saw two movies this weekend so that we could stay out of the heat and we went to a Terrence Blanchard show at the Regatta Bar in Cambridge. The two movies were I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry and The Bourne Ultimatum. I wasn’t really impressed with either one of them and almost fell asleep in the latter. I went to the gym on Sunday and watched a lot of TV. Yes, I know that it is considered bad, but I do it anyway. I watched a marathon of the Rock of Love episodes I haven’t seen. Jes or Sam better win! I really can’t stand Lacey or Heather (although Heather is better than Lacey), so I hope they get kicked off soon.

Also, I am still reading the Harry Potter series and I am currently on The Goblet of Fire, the fourth book. So far, it is my favorite book and I’m only about a fifth of the way into it. Because I check out so many books, the librarian asked me if I read at work. I wish that I could sometimes.

I am trying out a new choir tonight in Southborough. They are called the Assabet Valley Mastersingers and they seem to have a nice repertoire. I was in the Sounds of Stow chorus last year and I may go back, but this other chorus has an open rehearsal tonight, so I want to try it out for that reason. Also, they have a chamber choir and although I may not be good enough for it, I can always ask about that opportunity as well.

It’s birthday week and I am excited! But I will be twenty-five, oh no!! Brian and I are going out to eat on Thursday, but I’m not sure where yet. I would love to go back to The Melting Pot, but Brian doesn’t really like it. If anyone in the area would like to go, let me know. It’s awfully expensive though, but great for dessert. Mary, I think there is a location in Burlington or around there. Fondue rules!

Brian’s parents are having us over for dinner next Sunday, so that may be a birthday event, too. Yes, I have a birthday week; it is a little narcissistic, but really fun.

Maine Weekend

Well, we did end up having a good time in Maine, even though the trip was cut short because of Brian's interview at Tewksbury High School for a band teaching position. Although initially upset by this, I got over it and now embrace my extra time at home. So, on Saturday, I worked at the credit union in the morning and we left for Maine at 3:00. Portland is really a short drive from here, about two hours. It was a pretty town, on the harbor. We parked, walked around for a little bit, drank beers, and then realized we weren't in the hip part of town any longer, so we drove over to Old Port and parked in a garage. We walked around for a while, ate dinner at an Irish pub, where I actually commented that it was sad they only played U2 and the Cranberries. Of course, I love U2, but I'm sure they could have played other Irish music (Perhaps Thin Lizzy, Van Morrison, Celtic Woman? ). Anyway, our dinner was really good: I had fried haddock and chips, mixed pub and sweet potato, and Brian had a lobster roll; we shared steamers as well. After dinner, we walked around into lots of shops and I bought a few knicknacks-- postcards, maple syrup, candies.

Anyway, apart from that, we drove up to Pownal, next to Freeport, and set up our tent in the Bradbury Mountain State Park. This time, we had an air mattress, which was much better for our backs than sleeping on the ground. The next day, I woke up fairly early (like today as well) and took a shower in the nicest shower I have ever been to at a campground. The only problem, the camp had latrines instead of toilets and they weren't anywhere near the shower house. Although, the latrines were very nice and had toilet paper and anti-bacterial gel. Okay, enough about toilets. Brian and I drove to Freeport for breakfast at Friendly's and then went to the huge L.L. Bean store to shop. I bought my mom a skirt, Grandad a calendar, and a scented hot pad (?) for us. It smells like balsam fir pines. Brian bought a shirt and a belt for himself. Freeport has really capitalized on the outlet market, so we went to a few more stores. Brian wanted to go to the art museum (as did I ), so we drove back down to Portland and went to theirs, which is a jewel of a museum. They had a nice collection of Winslow Homers and some very different modern art. The Portland museum even had a special Frank Lloyd Wright furniture/architecture exhibit. Very neat. Next, we decided to go back to the state park to do a little hiking. It was quite nice, even though the first hike up the "mountain" wore me out a bit. That night, we drove back into Freeport and had dinner at a barbeque place, which was great, and they even made blueberry bbq sauce! Back at the campground, we roasted marshmallows, Brian took a nap, and I read the second Harry Potter novel. I'm not done yet, but I'm almost finished.

Brian had his interview at Tewksbury high school yesterday and I hope it went well. I have my fingers crossed. We returned home and it rained sporadically throughout the day. I was pretty tired and my stomach hurt, but I did walk at the gym for an hour. We were going to go to see the Bourne Ultimatum, but I was too tired.

Today, we're going to Naragansett beach again. I like living close to the ocean.

Vacation week...

I'm really looking forward to our trip today and for this whole week. I know that in the aforementioned post, I was very pessamistic. I'm hoping to change my tune.

Another Thursday...

Although my life seems to be going in the right direction, I have been struggling lately. When you don’t have faith in anything but yourself (and in my case, very little of that), often it is hard to rely on other people. I don’t really talk about religion often, but I find most of the time that I’m not sure if I believe in God or any god at all. This is a pretty serious thing to talk about, so I won’t take long. Maybe it’s just that growing up, I was always let down by someone and still am let down by others. I know they say God doesn’t give up on you, but God and I aren’t close and really haven’t been for a long time. This is also another reason why I don’t feel comfortable getting married in a church. I would feel like a hypocrite; I don’t feel like I know that God anymore.



Well, I just feel there are a lot of disappointments in life, many of which happen to me. And I don’t have any ill family members, really big financial woes, or something horrible that has happened to me. Just small things, but to me, they loom over me like dark clouds. For example, Brian hasn’t gotten a job for the fall yet, people at work don’t like me (really only like one or two people, who are very immature anyway), our vacation is cut short, we have a very tight budget for the wedding, etc. The wedding has been a subject of woe lately. I told Sarah (Keith’s wife) that any expectation for this wedding seems too high. I’m almost not that excited to plan it anymore because Brian and I don’t even have a real date and without that, there is a halt to the planning. It’s a frustrating matter all the time. And I’m a frugal bride, so money is an object.



My father has also been an issue. First of all, he never called me or anything to congratulate me on my engagement. He did send an e-mail, which was sent to my spam account. When I finally called him, he said that he would try to make it to the wedding, wherever he was then (he was recently fired from another job and kicked out of his girlfriend’s home), but then he proceeded to change the subject. He never offered to pay for anything, and as far as I’m concerned, his name will not be on the invitation. Often, I feel like he is almost dead to me. What is his problem? My brothers and I don’t understand him at all. He will never really have any kind of active role in my life.



I’m thinking of telling my sister-in-law that she can’t be a bridesmaid any more. That is really drastic, but she never returns my phone calls. Well, sometimes she does. She’s just like someone else I know who never ever returns phone calls because they are just too busy. However, I don’t think she would come to visit her sister in Boston (like this other person) and not tell me. By the way, that really hurt and now, I don’t feel so bad for not going to her wedding. Okay, back to Sarah, my sister-in-law. I guess I can’t fire a bridesmaid now, but I should’ve known better than to ask her. However, she asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding, which is the only wedding I’ve ever been in so far.



Anyway, I needed to get all of that off of my chest. I feel like I am going to have a panic attack sometimes. It hasn’t really been that easy. It’s very easy for some people to be happy all the time, but for me, it’s not easy.

Paul's visit

One of my best friends, Paul, came to visit this past weekend. He arrived in Marlborough on Thursday night at about 7:30. I think I’ve mentioned this before—he is from outside Philadelphia, so he had to drive up the busiest part of the Eastern Seaboard (which I drove in March when I visited him) through New Jersey, New York, and Connecticut, basically the entire NYC metropolitan area. It can be frustrating, but also very cool knowing that you are so close to Manhattan. Anyway, when he got here, we decided to go to Friday’s (our old standard, we used to go to the one by our high school a lot) and then we saw “Hairspray,” the movie. Now, I’ve seen the older John Waters flick and the musical (in Louisville), so I had to see the new movie musical. I think that the film was made well, except I wasn’t very keen on John Travolta in the role of Edna (Divine was way better, Travolta was too “pretty” for the role) and they omitted a few of the songs, including “Momma, I’m a big girl now,” which is one of my favorites.



Anyway, Friday, we decided to go Boston, even though it was by far the hottest day of the weekend. I had to get a cavity filled (I’ve had like four in the past year and a half, which is terrible) at 8:30 am. Not really fun. We left for Boston at like 10:45 and got there at 12:15, running a little later because the T at Riverside is being repaired and we had to take a bus from Riverside to the Reservoir station, near Boston College, and then go into the city. We met Mary for lunch at the Copley Square station and then had a nice lunch at Joe’s American Bar and Grill; I love onion rings! We then went to see where she works, the New England Genealogical and Historical society on Newbury Street. I am very proud of her, as she has her dream job right now and loves it! She gets to research genealogy, etc. for people in the New England. After lunch, we went to H &M and I bought a new green cardigan with light green polka dots. I have a weakness for that store! That afternoon, we walked to the lovely Boston common and totally did a tourist thing—we took a swan boat ride. The swan boats are just these flat boats with swans on the end. Not really anything special, but now we can both say we did it.



It was still so hot. We continued to walk around and explore the city—the State house, Fanueil Hall and Quincy Market, the wharf, etc. We met Paul’s friend from high school (who goes to BU) and went to the North End, which is the Italian section of town, for dinner. Oh, a few hours before that, we got gelato in chocolate dipped cones in a neat ice cream place there as well. Dinner was okay (overpriced, if you ask me), but fine for the North End. We also went to Mike’s pastry to pick up some dessert for later (which we didn’t eat until the next day). At 10, we were home, and I was pretty tired, so we went to sleep.



On Saturday, we got a late start, but we drove to Naragansett beach in southern Rhode Island. There wasn’t much parking when we got there at 2, and I got really anxious about finding a parking place. I just got really angry about it and then had Brian drive to try to find a place. It was very bad; I was embarrassed. However, the rest of the day went smoothly. The beach was small and crowded, but beautiful and the water was pretty temperate. I think we’re going back on Tuesday, the 14th. Maybe it won’t be so crowded. That night, we came home, grilled some haddock (a fish) on the George Foreman, and had potatoes and steamed squash. Paul and I went out to a bar down the street from where I live, we had a few a drinks, and watched the first two episodes of “The Real World-Sydney” on demand. It’s funny, the show had not even debuted on MTV yet. It’s pretty bad and dramatic this time, with some ho named Kelly Anne on from Texas. But there’s a guy on there (Dunbar) who goes to Ole Miss, so that is cool. He’s a typical Ole Miss frat guy, minus the Mississippi mop haircut.



Sunday, we took another daytrip to the eerie town of Salem, Massachusetts. Of course, the town is really well known for the Salem witch trials of 1692, where nineteen were hanged and one person was crushed to death for not confessing to be a witch. It was a really sad event, but the sad thing is that the town capitalizes on it immensely. There are “witch” items in every nook and cranny in that town. However, the town was also a huge port in the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries and a big center for the whaling industry (I believe). Also, the town has a wonderful museum (the Peabody-Essex museum) devoted to maritime arts and art from New England, Asia, and Oceania (the latter two are not represented very often). They also have a really neat Chinese house that was brought over piece by piece from China and reconstructed in a section of the museum. Honestly, I would love to work at this museum; I think it is one of the coolest museums ever. We didn’t go to the museum on Sunday, but we did go to the Salem Witch museum (kind of a crock but explains the story of the witch trials pretty well) and to this mock trial of one of the accused. We ate at a restaurant on the harbor with a beautiful view and decent food. I cooked eggplant parmesan when we got home for dinner and we went to sleep pretty early that night. Paul left at 7:30 on Monday morning. Our next trip together will be in New York in October.



Today, I had the day off work because I am working on Saturday. Sarah and I went to look at wedding gowns in Sturbridge. I had an appointment and tried on at least six gowns. Although I really loved two of the gowns, they were very expensive (one was $1450 and the other was $998). Really, I only went to look at the styles. Next week, I am going to David’s and Rebecca’s in Louisville. There is one dress I really like at David’s—it is tea-length and made by Galina, and it is pretty inexpensive (I think it is $299). I think it would make a great dress to wear to the separate ceremony and reception (in Mass. and Louisville, respectively). Sarah and I went to lunch at a great old-lady lunch spot (I had quiche) and then we went to a bakery which served gelato. We also drove by a few venues that I am looking at. The process is just being held up because we have no date set. Although, I think I would really like my mom to see some of these places before I choose one. Anyway, it was nice to spend the afternoon with Sarah and I got some ideas about my dress, etc.